Rs 100: A National Treasure

I am one of those who has been labelled as 'also ran' in the currency pantheon and command little respect - either from users or even counterfeiters.

Though I had seen better days in 1970s, when average salaries used to be less than Rs 1,000, or even earlier period when average salaries were few hundred rupees, but all that is history and seems too Harappan to draw any comfort or feel inspired by recalling them.

Ever since I have been smarting under the shadow of my wealthier and much sought after cousins - Rs 500 and Rs 1,000 and relegated to the loose change category, clubbed with lesser mortals like Rs 50 or Rs 10 in the currency hierarchy.

I am not tempting enough to make a policeman wink at traffic infractions nor am I greasy enough for the palms of sundry babus to move files in various government offices.

Thanks to inflationary pressures, my purchasing capacity is so depleted that I cannot help my bearer buy a kilogram of toor dal. Think of it once upon a time (pardon my self pity) I could help a family buy a month's provisions.

However, all changed, changed utterly (my apologies to W.B. Yeats) on November 8. Those who used to hold me reluctantly due to my low denomination and tendency to bloat up their wallets, began to treasure and even hoard me.

On the other hand my wealthier cousins suddenly suffered a total meltdown of their worth. Many of them who were well ensconced in the high security safes and piggy banks for months and years were all hurriedly removed and shipped off to banks and illegal currency changers for exchange or deposit, and ultimately to RBI shredders.

To me it was a mixed feeling. The sudden newfound interest and attention gave me a heady feeling, but I also began feeling sorry for the wealthier peers who got abruptly evicted and packed off to oblivion. It made me feel philosophic about the transitory nature of power and glory.

Though basking in euphoria I was a bit perturbed when I heard about the proposed currency of Rs 2,000 denomination and felt that my new found acceptance would be a short lived one.

My concern got aggravated when TV anchors and WhatsApp forwards started waxing eloquent about some of the never heard of security features of this currency denomination and how it would be a nightmare for counterfeiters.

One of them proclaimed it had a microchip, hitherto found only in ramrod stiff debit and credit cards. Hence it can be tracked by the government using satellites whenever it is stored in bulk.

Another gushed that the embedded nano-GPS chips can provide precise location of the currency and every note can be tracked. The chips are so powerful that even if they are buried 120 metres below the ground they can send signals to satellites.

Hence those looking to stash their fortune underground will have to trade their humble pick axes with borewell drilling machines if they wish to keep their treasure chest away from the long arm of law.

All this information gave me a terrible complex. It was as if the government was letting loose an iPhone 7 into an universe inhabited by telephones of Alexander Graham Bell era.

I waited for the D-day when the banks and ATMs reopened after a day's break to dole out the new currency in exchange of old ones.

At first there were some happy faces of people flaunting their new Rs 2,000 rupee note and soon social media was awash with it.

Look wise I was relieved as it had nothing much to write home about. For some it looked like a glorified version of money used in Monopoly game and for the more plebeian class it was akin to a lottery ticket. For some the pink shade reminded them of Govinda's trousers - which he wore while gyrating to double entendre songs in the 90s.

But amidst all this hilarity I waited with bated breath to know about the much touted chip and its magical qualities. It came as a big anti-climax and relief when the RBI itself put out a statement denying it. 

For the the proud owners of the new Rs 2,000 notes, reality began to sink in soon. A few selfies later, when they tried to transact the pink note, they found it had no takers. Even ritzy super markets are refusing to accept them if the bill amount is less than Rs 1,000 or even Rs 1,500 and they are forced to use cards or lower currency denominations.

Thus for me demonetisation has brought back my achche din. Now it has become a national obsession to pine for me and hoard me. And I am really loving it!!

Also Read: Bangalore Beat

Under Holy Cow's Shadow: A Buffalo's Lament

I am told even in United States, where colour of one's skin is a polarising factor, there are towns, military regiments (courtesy Bob Marley popular number Buffalo soldier...) football teams and even universities named after me. But in India every student studying Hindi in his or her tenth class has to mug up the popular proverb - kala akshar bhains barabar (loosely translated it means an illiterate person). Other Indian languages also don't treat me kindly and I figure in phrases used to convey, ugliness, sloth and sloppiness. My jet black skin is something this acutely pigment obsessed country could never come to terms with, though they never had any problem in devouring what comes out of my udder!
 
So thanks to this deeply ingrained prejudice I have to live in the shadows of my fair skinned cousin the cow - which is worshipped as the earthly embodiment of the Kamadhenu - a mythical animal believed to be the source of all prosperity. For bulls in most Shiva temples there is the statue of Nandi, which is also worshipped with great reverence.
 
As for me the only reference in Hindu mythology is as a vehicle of Yama, the god of death. If there were social media those days forget getting 'like' or 'followers', I would have been trolled and reported for abuse by cow lovers.
 
Whether it is newspaper ad of some dairy major or on a tin of ghee or butter it is always the cow that enjoys pride of place. I never figure in any of them.
 
However, what baffles me most is that despite this big time belittling the dairy farmers in the so called cow belt rely heavily on my milk. The reasons vary from milk quality and output to their very survival in the business. Firstly milk flowing out of my udder has higher amount of fat and the overall output better than what my privileged cousin offers. Moreover compared with cows we are not very finicky regarding food and hence rearing us is much more cost effective. No wonder we command a high price in the market, and some of our high milk yielding Murrah cousins get sold for prices on par with some luxury car brands.
 
Then of course there is the ticklish issue of ban on cow slaughter. Even at the risk of sounding naive, I often wonder why no such ban for me? Ultimately the burden of providing meat, leather and even milk falls squarely on my shoulders. Quite ironically once the ban is imposed, the demand for cow tapers off. The dairy farmers, though not as cutthroat as the wily banias, are practical people and definitely factor in the costs cows may incur once they stop producing milk. Hence they gradually switch to rearing buffaloes. On the other hand states where cow slaughter is allowed dairy farmers continue to prefer cows.
 
The issue of cow slaughter is again being flogged with some more states issuing a ban. It would only mean more dairy farmers relying on me (India is already home to half the number of buffaloes in the world) for milk; beef exporters and tanneries for my flesh. In short I am the de facto Kamadhenu in most parts of the country.

Another intriguing factor is that there is ban on sale of beef only in domestic market, but not on exports, which of course is a cash cow no government, even with purest of shakahari DNA, can afford to renounce. Last year beef exports stood at $4.3 billion and is expected to increase this year, notwithstanding the current government's aversion to 'pink revolution'. Hence, the long arm of law is only meant for those who do the lowly task of transporting cattle in trucks and trying to sell it in the dusty, flea infested local markets, while well heeled exporters are left untouched.

In addition to tanneries, the beef industry also sustains other lesser known businesses such as bone crushing and powder industry, horn processing industry, blood processing, animal fat and soap industry, which employ large number of people.

Also Read: Bangalore Beat

Lament of 'Achche Din'

I was mostly used by people in their day-to-day conversations in past tense, often laced with strong dose of nostalgia to lament about the loss of good old days - be it college life, first crush or pre-nuptial courtship. Hence when BJP, sometime in the beginning of this year, chose to use me to refer in future tense, it came as a pleasant surprise.
 
I was all over radio and TV as part of its campaign to woo voters and as they say the rest is history (read hysteria) - the dope worked well on voters and turned them delirious. And for me it was a heady feeling and brushed off warnings by my ageing uncle 'garibi hatao' (thought he was being plain jealous) that soon I might get reduced to a joke and be used in pejorative sense.
 
For a couple of days it was celebration time with money bags of Dalal Street fuelling Sensex rallies. Soon the  government rolled out more slogans such as 'swachch Bharat', 'Make in India' and other less catchy cousins and I was never short of company.

But gradually like the wearing off of anesthesia after surgery, reality began to dawn. After a 'ho hum' Rail and Union Budgets, which only resulted in rise in train ticket fares and prices of essential commodities, sceptics began thinking aloud "when will achche din begin", but the besotted bhakts tried to silence them with angry trolls.
 
Then came the somersault over Aadhaar card for which countless Indians (even some Bangladeshis) had queued up to get photographed and finger printed. It was initially dismissed as UPA's folly and put in cold storage. But now it's on the way of being an instrument for getting LPG subsidy (as was planned by UPA). Moreover it has now become even more kosher - the finger prints taken during Aadhaar enrolment may be used to help start bank accounts as per Jan Dhan yojana. Sounds like 'puraney din' remarked a wag.
 
Of late many columnists who had vociferously believed that NDA would usher achchey din are having second thoughts about the government's performance with one of them lamenting that somebody has done black magic on Prime Minister.

About current ministry's performance another admirer and former minister cryptically remarked 'When all is said and done, more is said than done'. Then he regrets that 'The reduction of oil prices has put blinkers on people’s eyes and has delayed a reality check'. Another well known financial columnist observed that NDA was riding more on achchey sitrey (good luck) than achchey din, but wondered for how long.

Also Read: Bangalore Beat

Warm Farewell For Maruti 800

For past three decades this car provided the rites of passage for every middle class Indian graduating from two to four wheelers. Hence its swan song evoked a welter of emotions as it was the original people's car on Indian roads. Though many other aspirants for that title came along, none could replicate the success of Maruti 800.

This small car had become a signature vehicle for the middle class, though over a period of time it did get devalued by few notches when other better options came along. However the fact that the car will stop rolling out of assembly lines evokes a lump in throat even among those who had traded their Maruti 800 long ago for far more spacious offerings.

However the little remembered fact is that the birth pangs this car suffered were enormous. It had to go through a politico-legal wringer before the first car rolled out of the assembly line. The Maruti project was the baby of the then political enfant terrible Sanjay Gandhi and was seen as an example of cronyism in the licence permit raj. After the Janata government came to power in 1977 the company was liquidated, a commission was formed to investigate various scandals associated with it. Meanwhile, the factory at Gurgaon (not a single car had rolled out by then) was mothballed during its tenure.

A year after Indira Gandhi came back to power in 1980, it was decided to revive the venture. Under the chairmanship of V Krishnamurthy, a civil servant, the hunt for a foreign collaborator began. They zeroed in on Japanese auto major Suzuki (more famous for its motorcycles) and as per the JV signed, Suzuki were to supply compact built units. The rest they say is history.

The blooming of Maruti 800 coincided with the rise of Indian middle class and with the liberalization of the 1990s its sales entered top gear. Easy finance options made the car all the more affordable. Soon it became an indispensable component of 'decent marriages' (a euphemism used in newspaper matrimonial ads to hint that lavish dowry will be paid, as against 'simple marriage') and replaced Bajaj and Lambretta scooters (both now reduced to museum pieces) from the dowry list. It became an aspirational car for the yuppies and the affluent class in the hinterlands.

Soon the Indian roads began getting overrun by these 800 cc wonders and elbowed out old jalopies such as Ambassador and Premier Padmini. Though it was no match to their size and spaciousness, it made up for it by being generations ahead in terms of technology. Its low turning radius made it easier to handle on crowded city roads and gallis.

The coming of Zen in mid-nineties and later Korean players such as Hyundai Santro and Daewoo Matiz took some sheen off its prime position.  But the doughty Maruti 800 soldiered on, aged gracefully and displayed a longevity way beyond anybody's expectation. Even today it maintains a commanding position in the entry level segment, despite cheaper offering like Tata Nano. Hopefully Maruti will continue its entry level dominance with Alto 800.

Picture courtesy: Facebook

Also Read: Bangalore Beat

India' Population Conundrum

Right from school days, Civics text books drill into our heads that the country's runaway population is our major problem. And the demographers, in order to show its magnitude, resort to dramatic comparisons - the most popular one being that every year we are adding the population of Australia to our overcrowded land. So whatever little progress is made gets neutralised by it. Forget metros, even small towns are bursting at the seams due to population pressure.

In seventies we had the famous 'hum do hamare do' campaign and while travelling through highways in north India, the water tanks in some nondescript villages had the graffiti 'parivaar bhi seemit, paani bhi seemit' (loosely translated it meant 'small family, less water consumption').

But somehow the country's family planning drive met with only limited success in some parts (that too mainly in urban areas), while in vast swathes (especially the infamous BIMARU hinterland) it did little to arrest the burgeoning population. The reasons ranged from policy loopholes to downright lack of political will and then of course the well entrenched patriarchal mores surrounding girl child. As a negative fallout it encouraged female foeticide and spawned a cottage industry involving doctors and diagnostic labs to carry out sex determination tests. The end result has been an  alarmingly skewed sex ratios in many states.

The coercive sterilisation tactics used during the infamous Emergency made family planning a dirty word and the political class became cagey about promoting it.

Now we have hurtled ourselves within a striking distance to overtake even the most populous nation - China, that has a land mass three times our size. The recent 'population map' of India (albeit with truncated Kashmir), going viral on Twitter, shows the magnitude of problem in a more alarming light. The population of every state seems to be on par with some of the most populous countries in the world.

Thus the country's most populous state Uttar Pradesh has a population higher than Pakistan and is on par with Brazil, which is ranked fifth in world population ranking. By the way Brazil's population is spread over a land mass that is greater than whole of India. As for Uttar Pradesh its land mass shrank a decade ago after Uttarakhand was hived off.

The next most populous state Maharashtra is on par with Mexico, ranked eleventh in world; followed by Bihar which is on par with Philippines, ranked 12 and West Bengal on par with Vietnam, ranked 13. Comrades in Bengal will be happy to know that they have one more thing in common with Vietnam.

Andhra Pradesh has a population equal to Egypt, ranked 15. Madhya Pradesh has a population equivalent to Turkey, ranked 18, while Tamil Nadu and Rajasthan are equal to Thailand, ranked 20.

Next in line comes Gujarat and Karnataka and their population equivalent of that of Italy, ranked 23. This is a comparison that Narendra Modi and his ardent followers may not be happy about.  For Gujarat strongman anything Italian reminds him of his political rivals.

Interestingly Kerala (one of few success stories in population control) has a population equal to Canada, ranked 37 in world, but the North American country has a land mass nearly three times that of India! Good news for Kabutarbaaz (human traffickers) and those moving heaven and earth to get 'kaneda' visas.

Now the population debate has been turned on its head. The term 'population explosion' is passe, now demographic dividend is the new mantra. The policy makers are now trying to make a virtue out of their failure to curb population growth. Recent census data shows that those in the 15-24 age group form more than 60 per cent of the population. They argue that if provided with right skills, they could prove to be a very productive asset. However history has shown that when it comes to planning, execution and political will, our leaders inspire little confidence. Hence there is little to look forward to the so called dividend, it will most probably prove to be a liability.

Image source: Twitter

Also Read: Bangalore Beat

Emerging Financial Ghettos

While TV channels were riveted by Khobragade circus, India's richest man took a momentous decision of shuttering his non-vegetarian food business, ostensibly owing to objection from vegetarian share holders. The move evoked three cheers from Internet Hindu keyboard warriors and PETA types who hailed it as an 'ethical' step. Did I hear K G Basin, Swiss Bank accounts, 2G, Aston Martin ... ? Oh come on after all which businessman does not have run-ins with tax and law enforcement agencies. So why deny Mukeshbhai his due.

The move smacked of an exclusivism similar to the one displayed by upmarket housing societies of South Mumbai barring tenants or buyers who happen to be non-vegetarians (read Muslims). Though talking of exclusive housing societies in Mumbai, it must be mentioned that there are similar enclaves of Parsees, Muslims and Christians and this trend has more or less continued ever since it got a booster dose after the Babri Masjid demolition riots.

Businessmen are known to trim sails according to political winds, and since Narendra Modi seems to be the frontrunner for the next elections, they are working overtime to build bridges with the party in waiting. Hence the above move should be seen in that backdrop. Otherwise why would they shutter down meat business now, after running it for five years. And to be fair to Ambanis they are not alone. Most business houses and the Sensex-driven class sees the current UPA government as lame duck with no quaking to do.

Coming back to investing, this kind of 'ethical' activism has been prevalent in the Indian bourses for nearly a decade. Already in the BSE there are Halal and Dharmic stocks. The former shuns businesses that charge interest, deal with alcohol, pork, liquor and gambling, while the latter professes to help Hindus, Buddhists, Jains, and Sikhs to invest in stocks that are in sync with their religious beliefs. The don'ts in Dharmic list comprises tobacco, aerospace and defence, brewers, casinos, gaming, and pharmaceuticals that indulge in animal testing and genetic modifications. Soon we may even have Khap stocks index listing companies that promote sex determination equipment and proscribing companies involved in making ladies jeans and ingredients for chowmein!

The question arises as to how does one monitor whether these companies are not straying from the moral high road of religion. Moreover what about other ethical tenets such as desisting from employing child labour, fleecing workers and customers or land grab from poor tribals. Sorry, they cause as much excitement to Sensex movers and shakers as Khobragade's maid to Indian media.

As more such financials ghettos emerge in the Indian investment scape, the analysts can safely bet on a 'secular' growth for these stocks.

Also Read: Bangalore Beat